HOOK ME! Contest Winner

There’s a reason I don’t judge the contests on Life64, and it’s because I hate having to pick one out of so many good entries.  I did do the judging on this one, so if you are mad that you didn’t win, it’s all me.

That said, I have read through the entries and chosen a winner.

To recap, the contest challenge was to write the opening of a story, starting with the opening line as:

These days, I find myself doing things I thought I would never do.

Keep it to less than 200 words.  This is just the opening of a story, not the entire story.  It can be about anything or in any genre.  The winner will be the one that I thought was most intriguing, original and made me want to read more.

The winning submission is by Nathan Payne.

These days, I find myself doing things I thought I would never do. Take for example the gun I hold in my hand, smoke rolling out of the barrel. In the confining elevator, the reverberations of the gun’s retort couldn’t escape and it feels as though they focused their efforts on the soft tissue of my inner ear.

I didn’t pull the trigger. I wasn’t even holding the gun. Nonetheless what I did is beyond anything I expected. I’m an data analyst for Christ’s sake; my day is usually full of reams of paper, logarithms, and a boss who aims his nasal hairs over the rim of my cubicle and can’t say his S’s without whistling.

Guns, martial arts and, what I would call Hollywood style mobsters; are not a part of my life. So why am I here?

It would be easy to say it began when I stepped onto this elevator, but then I would be ignoring the things that predate this moment. My recent work hasn’t been normal. I know this. But I think I may be the only one. My boss surely doesn’t know. It would be more appropriate to say it began when Candace…

Congratulations, Nathan.  While the literal smoking gun is not original, I was very interested in hearing how this story was going to unfold.  I particularly liked the glimpses into the MC’s life that emphasized the opening line and contrast in his normal life and what he was doing ‘these days’.

There were other very good entries, but I can only pick one.  I’ll get your prize in the mail to you later this week, Nathan.

And keep your eyes peeled.  Later this week, we’ll be announcing a new contest with unique prizes and first, second and third place winners.


2 thoughts on “HOOK ME! Contest Winner

  1. Pingback: New Method of Outlining and, I Won a Contest! | The Writer's Codex

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